I first met Annika while we were co-teaching theatre to a group of children through Neptune Theatre. We crossed paths again during Women in Film & Television - Atlantic New Waves workshop series. Annika has always struck me with her insightful questions, presence and depth. She has a wicked sense of humour that is complimented with a beautiful tenderness.
How would you describe yourself?
I have two speeds. Total neat freak or complete slob; health obsessed or sitting around for days eating nachos; that kind of thing. I've rarely been in a happy medium between the two and that's something I'm trying to work on.
What role does creativity play in your life?
I believe that as humans, creativity is our life blood. I can't imagine a world in which I can't play and that is what creativity is; it's playing, it's exploring, it's discovering. All of these elements are important as an actor, to allow yourself to be vulnerable and let your imagination run free.
What are you currently working on?
After being an on again/off again actor for the past several years I have decided to give it 100 percent and see what happens. It's been thrilling, yet so grounding to feel this renewed sense of focus and self-awareness that I don't think I've ever felt quite as strongly in my whole life. It's so exciting to see this part of myself and I'm looking forward to seeing where it takes me.
What was the last book/movie/podcast that left an impression on you?
The Girls by Emma Cline. It's a thinly veiled fictional retelling of the Manson Family from the perspective of a young girl, Evie, who is welcomed into the inner circle. It's beautifully written and though I have no personal experience with cults of any kind, Evie's tale is incredibly relatable to any woman who was ever been a teenager. Cline articulates Evie's experiences and emotions in a way that adds depth to an otherwise trivialized time in a woman's life. Would recommend to all.
What advice would you give to other creatively driven people?
Try, try, try and suck. This has been a tough one for me to learn and I still struggle with it daily. To start writing the answers to these questions I had to stop censoring myself before I even began to type! When I remember that I don't have to be spectacular when performing, I just have to do my best, it really takes the pressure off. I've heard it so many times, perfectionism kills creativity. When we put these crazy, unrealistic expectations on ourselves to be something that really nobody is, it doesn't allow for the wonderful, unexpected discoveries that we can make about ourselves and our art.
Once you get to 'Two Years Old', experiences become not just a moment in time, but a tangible experience that you get to turn over and over again. Like a smooth rock in your hand, you let the experience rest inside you. Pondering its shape, texture, edges and feelings.
This is what thrills me about the new stage we are in. We get to curate, cultivate and choose moments for each other.
We've created little moments as we go and now we are getting into new things.
This time:
Our provincial wildlife park. A place to celebrate local and national wildlife while supporting the rehibiltation of those injured, and in the some cases, give them a perminate home after being badly injured. While many of these animals have been born into captivity from zoological institutions around North America, what we love about this park is how it enforces to the public that these are animals we are to learn about, respect, rehabilitate and give the appropriate habitats to.
Introducing Zoë to and reminding ourselves, how important our wildlife is, the responsibility that we have to conserve their habitats, their safety and their future is a beautiful experience and one we want to continue exploring.
This was a fun way to spend our Victoria Day and one we'll be revisiting as we grow.
*Special moments:
Seeing a Canadian Goose all wrapped up. Maybe warming a nest or just sleeping. Either way, just as majestic as if it was flying.
Zoës reaction to the Arctic Wolves. Pure enthralment.
In this video I tell my Best Friend about the products I use in the shower and post shower.
Featuring GlamGlow , First Aid Beauty, OGYX Shampoo etc.
Permission to make.
This was the main theme I left with after soaking in those five workshops that "Women in Film and Television Atlantic" provided myself and other women.
There is something about women that without even knowing it, we tend to insight doubt, fear and lack of knowledge into our minds as we ponder what it would be like to try our hand at something.
"I didn't go to school for that."
"I won't be as good as her/him."
"They won't understand why."
"I am a fraud."
"I am a mother. I can't do that too."
Whatever it is we tell ourselves, they can be summed up in a few themes.
Not our place. Not our intelligence. Not practical. Not believable.
I sat there in this class with women who act, write, perform, produce, aspire and was told again and again from the women (and one man) who stood and gave us a few tools for our toolkit that we were capable.
Make something. Anything. Seek out the women and others around you who know something. Maybe they won't help you, and maybe they will. Maybe all they can do is point you in the right direction.
By that doing, that showing up for yourself and forging the path, that is the permission.
I Learned About Myself
I found out that I am an abstract creator. I think with colour, texture, emotions rather than with words, logic or technical thinking. I may use the craft of words, but my mind is all contrast, gut and emotions. I learned I need to work on finding ways to bridge that gap. The gap between abstract and logic. I learned that writing will always be my first love, and I learned that editing is everything that would make me want to pull my hair out. I learned that I knew a lot more about creating online content then I give myself credit for and I learned that playing with other mediums that interest me to produce my work will not only teach me more about myself but open up creative spaces in my brain I hadn't thought about before.
Ultimately, I learned not to limit myself in capabilities. That it's really about being able to humble yourself in what you don't know, in order to gain that awareness of what you can learn from and alongside others.
I am still figuring out how to apply these things into my work and my next projects. I truly believe this opportunity has been the stepping stone for me for ideas and mediums which before I would have told myself wasn't my place.
It's time to let go of limitations and be a bit incredulous in my scheming.
PERMISSION TO MAKE!!!
Throughout my life I have been told countless times
"You need to slow down."
"Take your time. Don't rush."
"Stop doing so much."
"You need to take a break."
"Put your life on hold for now."
"Don't expect to be able to do it all right now."
These words suffocate my spirit. Leaving me feeling misunderstood and unseen.
So I reach for the truth.
Those statements were not the truth of me.
The truth is what God has been whispering to me this whole year.
"Know your places.
Claim your ground.
Sink into them.
Be so entrenched in it, that what is not for you to carry will fall away."
This is the lesson of this year.
I still manage to worry again and again.
"What will they think?
Did I dissapoint them?
Will they understand?
How can I fix it?
What if I am wrong?
What if I didn't get it right?"
And that's when God fills my lungs with fresh air and reminds me.
"Just breathe.
Be where you are at.
With me.
With your purpose.
Show up to your living,
I will show you how to navigate.
Just Breathe"
I am learning what it means to be that woman who is busy making art and may not show up to everything. Who is dedicated to raising her little and yet equally dedicated to the quiet rest it takes to make both words and person. I am learning to breathe and accept that what some find easy, I will find hard and what some find hard I will find easy. That I may not be the woman cooking the family a meal, but I am the woman laying in her daughters crib for an hour just to make memories, cuddle and connect. I may not be the woman who gets every birthday card written, but I am the woman who notices the little things and goes deep quick. I may not breathe like someone else, but I breathe with the air God has given me, and that is the place I want to be.
Here.
Just breathing.
The Mom Show at the Company House in The Atlantic Fringe Festival 2016
So far in my work, the theme of womanhood has been a common thread. Maybe its because I am a woman, or maybe it's because I am the type of woman who thrives on the magic that happens when women unite forces. Either way, when it came to continuing 'The Mom Show' I saw women being the centre of it's continued existence.
Women coming alongside other women, women collaborating with women and women becoming a stronger voice in the places they hold in this world.
In saying that, I also believe that my own self-doubt, fear and insecurities are the reasons I feel inclined to focus on women and their experiences. When we unite as women we create spaces for empathy, courage and strength that didn't exist before. We create them for ourselves and future generations. It's not about women who work, women who stay at home, women who have kids, women who don't have kids, women who can't have kids.... It's not about any of that.
It's about ALL of Women. Her story, is my story. My story is her story.
I write from my own experiences and I believe that finding ways to collaborate with other women not only brings unity and compassion but a depth in compassion for each other.
I focus on women because I am one. I was raised by one, and I am raising one.
So yeah, I may not be Lena Dunham, Sarah Polley or Marie Forleo, but I am Amy Grace and what I have to say and share with the other women sitting in the arena of vulnerability with me, is sacred, raw and some real deep shit.
___
THE MOM SHOW YOGA FLOW
With Katherine King
37 Shaughnessy Place
Bedford NS
Sunday May 28th
3:00 - 4:30
Heres the dang honest truth!
I don't know what I am doing until I am doing it.
Showing up for 'the work' is often how I find out what 'it' is.
If binging on Netflix made me happy for long periods of time, I would do that instead.
With that in mind, now you need to know:
Making work that is collaborative, insights discussion, and creates vulnerability is my happy place and motivation. I will do anything to keep on that track. In fact, when I am not on that track I am miserable. I get anxious, unhappy, fidgety and restless and destructive.
Thats what you need to know about yourself. What is your true motivation for anything? Once you tap into that, aligning your life and decisions with your motivations will create an amazing burst of energy.
Self - awareness is motivations best counsellor. You can know all there is to know about something, but if you aren't self aware enough to take a step back and see what is taking away your motivation to be enjoying, doing, creating... then you miss out on that boost to go farther.
For me? I just work on showing up everyday for that time that I have been given. On a good day, I don't overthink it or get caught up in the "who the heck do I think I am concept." I just show up and do. There will always be a little person on your shoulder trying to whisper in your ear that nothing you do is going to create a difference. Our job isn't to live without that little person, but to acknowledge it's presence and that everyone has one. Every single person in this world lives with that self-doubt and when we recognize that humanity, we recognize how silly it is to get caught up in our own importance, our own ego and self-bigness.
You are called to show up to what you feel you are called and led to do. That is it. Show up, and maintain enough self-awareness that reminds you of your calling and that no matter what part you are playing it is an important part.
And if you happen to look over your shoulder after a while and see how far you've travelled, do yourself a favour: acknowledge it, give thanks for it, and then get back to work.
Birthday Rosé
Clarity.
There is something about this birthday, this year, this moment in time where I am stepping into a new clarity. A clarity I haven't been able to grasp onto before. This is different.
If anything 27 taught me, it was to make. Make with abandon and without reason. Good things come from making and clarity comes while one is in absolute abandon to their own inhibitions. Deciding to write and produce 'The Mom Show' has delivered me into a new comprehension of my own skills, worth and passions.
28. It's a year I feel called to be incredulous with my work and my reach. I can clearly see the time in which I need to set aside to pour into projects and I can clearly see how my focus will not only bleed into my own joy and peace but also into the atmosphere around me.
It is daunting to know that when I toasted 28 I was also welcoming in a new sense of 'limitlessness'. The word of my 27th year has journeyed with me and now I have come to a new word.
Claim. Alongside Incredulous. To believe that what I have been given, no matter how incredulous it may seem, has a life in this world. Call it daring, call it wild, call it whatever you will.
Whatever 'this' is, this is what I was made for.
In this video I tell my bestie about the trench coat from Pseudio I just bought.
xo
What can you expect from this inspiring women-centered special event?
Your Presenters
Amy Grace
by Amy Grace is a writer, producer and performer who is passionate about empowering women through collaborations and various art forms. In the past year Amy wrote and starred in The Mom Show or the Most Boring Show Ever at The Atlantic Fringe Festival. Since 2013 she has been running a monthly collective meet up for creative women in the Halifax area “The Creatives”. She trained at Neptune Theatre's Pre Professional Training Program, is married to her high school sweet heart, Jeremy Lai, an engineer and her online/all things technology right-hand. Together they have a toddler and live in Bedford.
Katherine King
Katherine King is a Registered Massage Therapist, a Registered Yoga Teacher, and a mom to three snarky but loveable tween and teen kids. She believes in living life FULLY and giving out vibes of caring and authentic connection to every beautiful soul she meets. She is THRILLED to be bringing back her signature touch style to yoga practitioners in the Bedford / Larry Uteck area. Currently, Katherine teaches a variety of awesome yoga classes: Flow, Yin, Restorative, Prenatal, and Yoga + Massage at several studios in the Bedford/Hammonds Plains area as well as through private instruction. Katherine's unique style of teaching asana and intention both UPLIFTS your spirit, as she guides you in each practice to become more GROUNDED in mind and body than ever before.
YOUR SHOW
The Mom Show or The Most Boring Show Ever, is an empowering and comedic take and journey through new motherhood from prenatal to postpartum. Using yoga as a platform, along with comedic honesty, Amy performs the journey of a woman becoming mother in todays society and aims to empower by delving into self care, self worth and what it means to see oneself as whole and worthy. The Mom Show isn't just for moms. It's for anyone wanting to take back their worth and have a laugh while doing it.
YOUR FLOW
Your 60 minute Yinyasa practice will bring vitality and nourishment to your body through 30 mins of all-levels flowing standing series asanas linked mindfully with breath, followed by 30 mins of glorious body softening Yin postures (floor series) with Katherine's amazing assists and grounding, soothing massage touch (optional, to each attendees consent).
YOUR VENUE
Enjoy your show and yoga flow in a beautiful sunlit and spacious practice area at 37 Shaughnessy Place in The Ravines of Bedford. A former QEII Show Home, it is situated along a private cul-de-sac where you will find ample and easy street parking.
YOUR TREATS (!)
We want to say "Thank You" for showing up and being involved in women supporting other women!
Every attendee is welcome to a celebratory, complimentary signature bevy post flow.
You will also depart with a truly unbelievable 'SWAG BAG' of awesome items from local Bedford/Hammonds Plains Womenpreneurs . You are not going to believe these goodies!!
A portion of the proceeds will be going to Dress for Success - Halifax Chapter.
Zoë Wing Zhe Lai - Two Years Old.
Coming alongside this little spirit to raise her into her place in this world has created an evolution in us. Finding more purpose, meaning and intention in the 'dailys'. Letting go of the unnecessary, making time for what creates a whole, healthy and functioning family, and growing deeper in a sense of individuality within all of that.
Two years of life has uncovered her independent nature. There is nothing more stunning than seeing a little woman assert herself and her discernment of her own readiness astounds us. When she has decided she is ready to learn a new skill, word or game, nothing will stop her. She has also the patience to wait for her own spirit and body to catch up. She will not be rushed or pushed into anything.
Peanut Butter Cupcake Cones - Family Tradition
Two years of solidifying our little family and learning about each other. Quiet moments before the days end, all of us in the bed, even the cat, snuggled in and we inhale that scent of togetherness.
Two years of uncovering her incredible personhood.
Thankful for this little spirit full of life, for her health, her nature, her ups and her downs. Every year with her is a blessing.
It's been over a year since we made this video for Newbirth Doula, Adrienne Kehler. It feels timely to re-share our love for doulas on our daughters Zoës second birthday and only a few days before we collaborate with the Nova Scotia Doula Association.
Check out their event page for this Saturday May 6th!
The Mom Show can be attended outside of this workshop.
4:30pm.
Bedford Basin Farmers Market
397, Bedford Highway
$15.00 at the door!
Excited to be spending this week preparing for showing 'The Mom Show' in collaboration with the Nova Scotia Doula Association for this coming Saturday!
Having a doula was a huge part of my birth experience and I am proud to be coming alongside them in this workshop!
If you are in the Bedford, NS area and want to see the show you do not have to be attending the workshop to come see it. Tickets will be sold at the door for The Mom Show so don't hesitate to come by and enjoy 30 mins of comedy and honesty rolled into one!
The Mom Show at the Rebozo Connection: The Gena Kirby Method
May 6th
4:30pm <---- The Mom Show Start Time
Bedford Basin Farmers Market
397 Bedford Highway
FACEBOOK PAGES
The Mom Show
Rebozo Connection Workshop
Childs Pose
I've been learning these past ten years that my vulnerability is what makes me not only stronger, but courageous and real. Being vulnerable is a refining process and with every step out in bravery that I have taken has lead me here. I wouldn't trade those risks, those times of despair, heart aches, disappointments or lessons learned for the comfort of staying in my seat.
I feel deeply, I live deeply and because of that, I believe I am called to be deeply vulnerable.
Even when, I would rather not.
As I cancelled an event I deeply wanted to see happen, I cracked open Brené Browns book "Rising Strong" and began to read her opening pages. The timing of reading her words was inspired and I believe I was kept from reading this book until now. Because now is when I needed it.
"I want to be in the arena. I want to be brave with my life. And when we make the choice to dare greatly, we sign up to get our asses kicked. We can choose courage or we can choose comfort, but we can't have both. Not at the same time.
Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it's having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome. Vulnerability is not weakness; it's our greatest measure of courage." - Brené Brown
So, I poured coffee this morning after doing yoga with my almost two year old, cracked open my journal and began to write about how I am still in this. That being vulnerable and falling is part of this whole process.
I am here and working on these projects for a purpose and that purpose isn't defined or decided by a simple cancelation, or words of critique. My job is stay grounded, stay on the surf board and ride the wave.
I choose courage. I choose vulnerability.
In this Episode Zoë and I show and discuss her dresses.
Megan and I met in High School where we bonded over our love for theatre, writing and our little posse of friends. Megan not only has developed her passion for theatre and writing into her professional adult life, she is a living example of what being a woman dedicated to the love of her craft is. She is passionate, and stays true to herself and that has been and still is something that moves me. Make sure to check out CSArt Ottawa and anytime she has work in your area.
How would you describe yourself?
I’m a playwright. I also like to write non-fiction. I’m a theatre director. I also started a small art business called CSArt Ottawa, which I guess makes me an entrepreneur. I’m a creative facilitator who specializes in adapting drama activities to diverse settings and groups.
This is a hard question. There are so many ways I would like to describe myself. I’m a person who, through profession, curiosity, and luck, has ended up in many very interesting rooms with fascinating groups of people. Businesspeople, statespeople, politicians, government workers, artists, activists, academics, people with disabilities, people who work in social services, faith leaders of different religions. Very rich people and very poor people, people with a huge amount of privilege and people who are severly underprivileged. I end up in very interesting conversations, and I switch hats a lot. I like to think of my artistic work as a condensation of these experiences, as a poetry that comes through me from the accumulation of the stories I hear and witness.
But that’s probably not the whole truth. It’s only poetry on the very best rare occasions. I end up writing about myself a lot more than I intend to. In some ways, you are only really writing about yourself.
What role does creativity play in your life?
It’s everything I do that is in any way worthwhile. Loving takes creativity. Getting up in the morning and finding a way to make yourself useful in the world takes a huge amount of creativity.
What are you currently working on?
I am writing a play right now inspired by my experiences working in social housing. It is my MFA thesis, due in 3 weeks(!). I am sure it won’t be truly finished for a while though… the theme is help, and how complicated it is to give and receive help. It takes a long time to think it through… I’m looking forward to taking a break from it because it makes me sad to sit down and write it, every time. Once it’s passed in, I’m going to go back to writing my play about virtual reality and the corporate tech world, because reading and writing about the crazy VR/AR technology and AI stuff going down right now makes me happy.
I’m also working on getting the second season of CSArt Ottawa launched! That’s a completely different creative task, curating and producing other people’s work. I’m enjoying it even more than I thought I would. It’s quite satisfying to find artists I believe in, give them resources for their work, and promote them. There’s very little ego in it for me, just the joy of gathering people and showing work.
And I recently took a day job in pursuit of a ‘parallel career’, a place to use my skills in other worthwhile ways while also taking the financial pressure off of my art work. I think there’s a real stigma around artists having day jobs; that it’s somehow an admission of defeat, or that your work suddenly becomes a hobby rather than a vocation. I think that’s terribly unfair. I have no regrets. I’m working with cool people on a cool project, learning new things, meeting new people. It is having a positive effect on my art work and my life.
What was the last book/movie/podcast etc. that left an impression on you?
I’m over halfway through reading The Idiot by Fyodor Doestoyevski. I had to stop for a while because it was breaking my heart.
It’s amazing that a 46-year-old Russian man from the late-1800s wrote something that a 27-year-old Canadian woman now can feel so connected to. That’s magic. It gives me hope right now when to me the world feels like it’s going to fall apart at any moment. I read the news almost every day, and then I read novels as an antidote to hopelessness.
What advice would you give to other creatively driven people?
Find your people. Collaborators whose work you believe in, and who believe in your work, are incredibly valuable. Honour those relationships.
It doesn’t matter how much money you make from your work, only how much heart you put into it, how hard you work on making it as perfect as possible, how much you try to learn, how honest you are with yourself, and how well this all connects with other people.
Being a writer and a task oriented person planners, journals, notebooks, pads of paper... they make me drool.
My problem? Too many options, layouts, designs, covers, sizes, brands, etc.
I came across the concept of bullet journaling either through youtube or Pinterest. I am not sure how it happened, but when I did... I was hooked.
Heres the link to the main website.
Heres how I do it.
Every New Year:
1 Journal for Day Planner purposes (Dotted paper)
1 Journal for personal journaling (Lined paper)
Both journals must be of similar size and compliment each other.
For this year?
A Leuchtturm1917 Taupe
A Kate Spade Rose Gold
I peruse my Pinterest board for saved bullet journaling images for the formats I believe would work for me, and then I play. I have fun and I end up getting a more refined idea of how I want my life to be and feel as I progress throughout the year.
Here is how I have formatted my bullet journal for 2017:
Introduction Page with Word and Vision Quote of the Year.
Year 2017 Overview
Wellness Wheel Map with inspiring quote
Month to Month Layout 'Migration'
Spring Layout with Goals and Wardrobe Planning
Month of April Intro Page.
A typical day to day layout.
Week Vs. Weekend Lifestyle Goals/Habits
2017 Check in Goals
Book/TV Shows/Movies/Podcast Tracker
In this episode I share with my best friend the details behind my new glasses and the process of getting them.
Malasana Pose / As I like to call it : the natural birthing pose.
I often get asked 'Why yoga?' when I describe my thirty minute one woman comedy/drama show is me on a yoga mat, doing yoga and using yoga as a platform to share my work.
I wrote The Mom Show or The Most Boring Show Ever at first, as a cathartic exercise. The only thing coming out after having a baby was 'about having a baby'. It was natural for me to let the words flow from a true and honest place. I hope all women believe that what they have to share in their evolution into motherhood is valued and has a place in this world. We need to hear more from them.
Woman. Mother.
Mother. Woman.
For me, they are one. Intertwined and equally as valuable. From my womanhood I am mother, and from my mother I am woman.
Learning how to move my body again post birth by using my daily yoga practice was a healing journey. My identity had been drastically altered and I was adrift with my own spirit and calling. We'd all like to be those tough women who say "Motherhood didn't change me!" But it does! Anyone who says that it doesn't either has never had a child, been parents for years and blocked that stage of life out, or are trying to sell you something.
Yoga is the ultimate mind, body, spirit workout. By practicing it everyday that first month after my daughter was born I was giving myself permission to connect with my breath, my heartbeat, my true core questions and thoughts.
So when I sat down with all of my thoughts on Mother. Woman. Woman. Mother. And began to edit each draft, I was seeing how clearly it all ebbed and flowed. I could feel the inhale and the exhale in my words and the most natural thing in that moment was to pair them with yoga.
I chose yoga because it doesn't hide the truth about you. If you are anxious or unsettled it shows, if you are strong and confident, it also shows. There is a raw and deeply spiritual physical representation of oneself when you move your body and this is why I chose Yoga to be the platform for a one woman show about womanhood and motherhood intertwined.